North Dakota Man high on Ecstasy caught shoplifting embarrassing sex toy, claims he did it cause he was embarrassed

fargo wiener26-year-old Christopher Wiener walked into a downtown Fargo sex shop looking to purchase an artificial vagina, aka a pocket pussy, however, when a female customer entered the store and noticed Christopher Wiener browsing the latex masturbation aids, Wiener, high on ectasy at the time, became self-conscience and embarrassed, subsequently pocketing the pocket pussy and making his way out the door. Unfortunately for Wiener, an employee of the sex shop witnessed Wiener exit the store with the sex toy in his pocket and promptly notified police.

Wiener was quickly apprehended walking down the street and was arrested for possession of stolen property i.e., shoplifting an artificial vagina. Upon arrest Wiener told police that he was embarrassed to purchase a pocket pussy in front of a women, so he took it. He went on to say, “I was just really frying balls on Ecstasy and really wanted to bang, I thought a pocket pussy sounded good. I saw an opportunity, I took it, and it was stupid.”

A bag of meth and a glass pipe were also found in Wiener’s possession. Consequently Wiener was charged with possession of drug paraphernalia and possession of methamphetamine, both Class C Felonies, thus trumping original shoplifting charge.

It just wasn’t Wiener’s day.

Full Story: Grand Fork Herald

One Response

  1. Vita July 9, 2013